Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Dear Peanut..... a Thanksgiving letter.


Dear Peanut....

It's two weeks from your due date, and I expect you early. That means sometime this week, the week of Thanksgiving, the week of my birthday, the week of my mom and dad's anniversary. Momentous week, isn't it? It's been so long and in some ways no time at all since I posted my first letter to you.

I am filled with thankfulness, and not just because it's Thanksgiving time. For small things. The beautiful leaves outside. A junky car that is still running. The fact that I get to keep my job and so my income remains stable. For deepening friendships. For my community group. For vulnerability. For roommates.
I'm so thankful for the whole family getting together for Christmas. In the life of third-culture kids, it's truly a miracle that BOTH our parents will get to meet you over the holidays. I love the Christmas lights we have up, the Christmas music we play, the coziness of blankets and cats and this big belly that promises your arrival soon.

I'm so thankful for your dad, for Isaac. I can't put that into words - how amazing it is to see him eagerly wait for you, coo over baby clothes, and talk to you as though you already understand. He loves you, and he loves me. That love that he and I have for each other .... the gift that it is, the beauty it has brought to my life... I hope you see it as you grow because there's no way for me to explain it to you. It has been miraculous, this marrying and loving thing. I love watching Isaac laugh at my clumsy pregnant self, and then come and cook dinner for me, or insist I call him for help getting out of the bathtub because he's so worried I'll slip. Your dad - he's sarcastic and opinionated and endlessly funny, but oh, he loves deeply too. Deeply and well.

And I am thankful for you too. It's strange to think that in a week my world could be in a flurry and I might be exhaustedly attempting to rest my healing body while figuring out feeding and sleeping and crying habits. How can things change so much so quickly? I am so excited, though, to hold you, to see what you look like, sound like, smell like. I will be.... I am already actually... a mother. What a miraculous thing. I am ready to welcome you here, little one, anytime you're ready! The waiting and anticipation might just kill us....

I am thankful, finally, that though I bring you into a broken world, that there is hope, and beauty, and meaning, and that inexplicably I have been allowed to know Him, and that this hope has quieted my heart, and that I can teach that same hope to you.

1 comment:

AHLondon said...

Are you going to post a quick announcement when he arrives? I'm going to keep checking. I love new baby arrivals! FYI, I've got a new post on marriage after baby. http://americanhousewifeinlondon.blogspot.com/2010/11/marriage-and-sex-after-baby.html
Happy belated Thanksgiving. And good luck.