Judah is asleep in his pack-n-play, surrounded by piles that need to be packed. Isaac is at our new house, unloading. I'm putting my feet up and listening to the music and writing for a moment before tackling the kitchen.
I am overflowing with joy right now.
When we walked into our new home (Granny's Cabin) this morning we discovered donuts left for us by our hosts. And outside they've set up a hammock, which makes me feel like I'm on vacation.
Because when we came back from our new place this time, we set Judah on the ground and he ran to the speakers and began to dance with great jubilation, despite the fact that not a sound was coming out of them. He's been so funny all day.
Because when we DID put on music and Isaac came in from taking boxes to the car, he started dancing with me and then when Judah got jealous we all three danced in one pack, stepping on feet and giggling.
Because our giveaway pile grows and I'm selling things on craigslist and marveling that we've managed to live from things found on sidewalks and sold for $10 on craigslist and given away by family. We have had all we need without ever spending much at all on furniture, which makes it so easy to walk away from all of this.
Because we deliberated for ages about where to stop for lunch in our new area, and at the last minute pulled into the Arby's parking lot. It turned out the guy in front of us had a kid named Judah, so we sat in the booth next to them and the two Judahs made faces at each other and giggled. And then it turned out the dad grew up in Japan, we had a friend in common, and after talking about family and McKinney and what we're doing in life, he left us his email address and said he'd like to support us. His last comment in response to my compliment about his daughter's red hair was that "It's amazing, my wife always wanted a kid with red hair. God amazingly cares about small things." Indeed.
Because this morning I sat on our porch and watched the wind bend and sway the branches on the tree I love, and I count three years in this apartment complex as a gift.
Because as I write my ipod pulls Michele Tumes from the random shuffle list, and I realize I've been listning to this for 11 years, and I am amazed at how we grow up and are the same people, just different.
Because here I am, going through transition again and it's messing with my psyche so that I cling to distractions from the change, and end up dreaming overly-obvious things (like having alum from the 80's return to my high school in Indonesia and wrestle with it all being different), but one thing I do know is that transition is always crazy but there is always beauty and joy and most of all God, no matter what else changes. I'm less sure than ever that I will be safe or secure or healthy, but I am also more okay with that than ever.